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Cookham Webmaster
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Posts: 1231

« on: April 01, 2015, 12:10:08 AM »

From Gravity Grand Prix Organisers

Popular TV presenter Jeremy Clarkson is to enter the annual Gravity Grand Prix in Cookham Dean.  The much-loved host of Top Gear will build and pilot a vehicle of his own design after being entered into the event by his family.

Clarkson’s appearance is expected to see the 2015 Gravity Grand Prix, taking place on September 13th, draw larger crowds than ever to line the 700m course and cheer on up to 30 teams taking part.

Peter Bartlett, one of the event organisers, revealed that he had been approached by Clarkson’s wife, who believes the star will benefit from having a new interest after his recent unexpected bout of gardening leave.

Bartlett revealed: “The way she phrased it is that she is “sick of having him at home”. He doesn’t help with the housework, and she hopes a project like this will keep him occupied.”

Bartlett added: “I was very impressed by Mrs Clarkson’s attention to detail and her commitment to health & safety.  She was particularly interested in the hairpin curve we call ‘widow-makers bend’, and kept me talking for ages about what could potentially go wrong if Jeremy isn’t properly briefed.”

Clarkson will be driving his own creation, the Mini Fracas, which superficially closely resembles a Mini Cooper but with more of a punch.

Paul Webb, chair of the Gravity Grand Prix, committee said: “We are desperately short of entries this year, so Mr Clarkson will be made most welcome. We have made arrangements to ensure the catering staff keep him supplied with hot food however late the hour.”

The Cookham Dean Gravity Grand Prix is easy to enter, with all the details at  Entrants have plenty of leeway in their design, and one of the highlights of this year’s event promises to be a dodgem car called Fun Fair Dismissal.
Sr. Member
Posts: 446

e tenebris lux

« Reply #1 on: April 01, 2015, 06:54:51 AM »

I think a lot of this is made up. should Stig to the facts.
« Reply #2 on: April 01, 2015, 08:06:49 AM »

You might find it difficult to attract a producer should you want to film the event.
Full Member
Posts: 104

« Reply #3 on: April 01, 2015, 08:55:22 AM »

Has to be an April Fool !!!!
Sr. Member
Posts: 347

« Reply #4 on: April 01, 2015, 11:16:40 AM »

Have you seen the Pizza Dreams Review talking about April Fool:

Pizza Dreams has today relaunched as Sweet Dreams offering puddings pizzaa.

We breakfasted on the special Easter pizza topped with a mini egg stuffed crust and topped with creme eggs and caramel eggs.

Later this morning we plan to go back and try the pancake pizzas with sugar and lemon.
« Reply #5 on: April 01, 2015, 12:37:35 PM »

Pull the other one!
« Reply #6 on: April 01, 2015, 02:26:31 PM »

I wonder if there's a CGGP vehicle large enough to accommodate JC's torso ... ?

I can just envisage him taking the vicious S bend on the downhill slope just before entering Hardings Green tilt the wrong way and he's a gonner ...

After which it will be down to the Sweet Dreams Café for him for a HOT pud pizza and a random punch in
someone's noggin - just to make him feel better!

Shame it's 1.4.15 .... as both events would've attracted large and 'appreciative' audiences ...
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